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Ep 12 + saying no and taking breaks for firm & kind boundaries

 

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Shownotes: 

We’re taking a piece of last week’s 10KGG workshop and putting it in podcast form. This is honestly one of my fave episodes i’ve recorded yet so jump in if you’re ready to talk about freelance boundaries, saying no to more things, not feeling guilty about the boundaries and all about how to do it in the most kind way possible.

 

Like more of what you’re listening to in this episode? Join 10KGG for monthly workshops and guest experts like this on different topics!

 

Connect with Carli Anna at…

Carlianna.co

10kgirlgang.com

instagram.com/carlianna_

https://www.tiktok.com/@carlianna_?lang=en

 

Learn how I book 10K+ clients using brand strategy here: 

https://carlianna.co/10kclientsbrandstrategy

 

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Full Episode Transcription: 

Hi, my name is CarliAnna and you’re listening to C-E-Overit.

Hello guys and welcome back to another episode of C-E-over it. This week’s episode we are going to be doing something a little bit different, it’s gonna be a little bit how to it’s gonna be a little how to but we’re gonna make it super fun. And it’s not gonna give you guys anxiety and I hope this is if anything just a little bit more referring to you especially if you have a lot on your plate because we are going to be talking about bound or ease.

This is something that I don’t feel like I would normally be excited to talk about that today I gave a presentation in 10 kgg which if you’re not familiar, is my mastermind all for creatives, trying to help them to get trying to help them raise their prices make more money and have more fun all while doing it. And this was honestly one of my favorite presentations I’ve ever done which to put this in perspective for you guys especially the last few months while we’re creating scale program inside of 10 kg I have created a lot of workshops to do with high tide kgg because in 10 kg do we have like the course but every month we also choose like a theme will choose like automations will choose mindset like this month was time and so we’ve been giving presentations on boundaries giving presentations on bottlenecks on the mindset about time like all that stuff to help you like be more efficient with your time and taking breaks and so I create at least a presentation per month that I give to Ted gave you do to go with that theme. And this is honestly probably one of my favorites and I was like I have to do a podcast episode about this I have to talk about this a little bit more because it was just really really fun and so this episode is gonna be for all y’all gals who you feel like you struggle with just loving your job lately because honestly I’ve noticed or what I’ve seen in my life at least is like any time I feel resentful towards anything anytime I feel like oh my gosh, I have a huge to do list or I just felt so overwhelmed. I’m feeling so resentful. It’s usually because of a boundary and I don’t want to get almost sort of like going into the horse bill of what I want to be doing and talking about, but we’re gonna save that for the actual episode so you’re just gonna have to listen up okay?

Okay, before we get into the episode we’re going to do what my favorite little segment ever what I’ve been listening to snacks and tracks. Okay, let’s start with the tracks opening up my audible I have been listening to Six of Crows the audible audio book tell me why I have not listened to this earlier tell me why someone smacked me in the face. If you are throne of grace glass lover an avatar Sarah J bass lover. I’m on the second book right now guys. It is so good. And I think part of the reason is that I think I’ve said this before any audiobook by and I don’t even remember her name. It’s the same girl who audios does the audiobook for Throne of Glass like I mean you’d up her voice to cut down like slurp it up is such a good audiobook voice. And she is one of the narrators for this book. It has a whole cast. And at first I think I just like never wanted to get into this book because the concept just never intrigued me even though I saw so much hype on it and tick tock I was like it like this just sounds too gimmicky for me like the idea of everyone like coming together and pulling up this giant heist like
I don’t know, it just felt like to magician II for me and to fake Like, it didn’t feel like real fantasy it felt for me for some reason.

We’re like a 1920s like, Let’s go pull a heist, you know, and that’s not at all like there’s some serious magic here. And the found family vibes which I heard over and over again on tick tock. The found family vibes are 10 out of 10 they’re not wrong. This is actually really really good. And it’s only a duology which I love. Like again I love Throne of Glass one of my favorite all time favorite books. But the fact that it’s like eight brick and long I don’t even know if it’s eight books, but it feels like eight if it’s not eight won’t be surprised if it’s more than eight bucks. It is so long. There’s so long. This was only to do ology and it’s a really good there’s also romance in here. There’s twists there’s turns there was betrayal. It’s not it doesn’t it’s not spicy, but it like feels spicy like Kaz oh my gosh is dark musky voice. It’s really good. I really really like it. It’s really becoming one of my favorite things ever. And I know Netflix has a series on this and I’ve heard the series is horrible. Saw a moment of silence for the Netflix series of Six of Crows being horrible because the book is amazing. I think I’m still gonna try and watch it because I don’t know I just really want to but that’s what I’ve been reading and loving.

Okay, as for snacks, okay, we’re going to talk about ice cream on snacks. You guys know I put you on the skinny cow. Little mini cones because it’s like six grams of fat and like 20 grams of carbs or something like that. And as someone who wants to eat ice cream every single day but also really wants to train for a marathon. I’m looking for that kind of combination in my ice cream. I felt something even better guys. something even better. I no joke guys have one to two ice cream cones a day. I have ice cream every single freaking day. So I feel like I know what I’m talking about. And also when growing up. I had a tub of ice cream. That was mine. Each family each member of my family had their own tub of ice cream with their flavor. We had an extra freezer out in the garage. It was not for food. No ne it was for ice cream. We were obsessed with ice cream still are an ice cream obsessed family. Like we would literally eat it every single day. Every single day we would have ice cream
so this ice cream it’s the blue bunny mini cones and they have it in a chocolate like if you like chocolate ice cream. This is what you get especially with like chocolate ice cream like chocolate chunks. This is the ice cream yet because the chocolate when it comes in a chocolate cone, okay, which is how it differs from the skinny cow first of all. Second of all, the chocolate ice cream is more chocolatey like the skinny cow ice cream that comes in the cone. It is good and it is chocolate but it definitely feels more like a Wendy’s frosty type of ice cream versus the blue buddy chocolate mini ice cream cone. It tastes more like actual ice cream. Do you know what I mean?

Second, they have a chocolate hardcoding on the outside of the ice cream. Oh my gosh, and there’s more ice cream. I don’t know how they do it. And this one actually has less fat and less carbs. And I was like okay, maybe the cone is going to be 10 times smaller than the other cone. No, it’s actually it’s bigger. There’s more ice cream, and there’s chocolate coating on the entire inside of the freaking cone oh it is so good seriously guys when I tell you I wanted to those a day I’m not joking at all
on the second note of ice cream i This is sad one This is sad one because I saw on tick tock do you guys are you so sick of me talking about tick tock because I am oh well grow up I saw on Tik Tok that the ninja creamy It was back in stock at Costco and I was like, should I get it? Should I not like I don’t know. We’ve been spending a lot of money with the move lately. But also I am $150 short on our grocery budget this month so technically I could stay within budget and still get this ninja creamy on sale right now. And so I was like debating it since Monday. Today is Wednesday. So not that long. But but I had the car open and I was like okay, I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna do it and then I didn’t end up doing it. I don’t know why and then today I was like, You know what, I’m just gonna do it. I’m gonna get the new to creamy because I had been dreaming about it ever since. I have been thinking about it and I just I really want to make like healthy ice cream. I want to make homemade ice cream and I want to make like gelato is like my kids will love like my son, LJ. He eats canned peaches by the jar. He drinks the juice. He eats the canned peaches. Like he loves canned fruits. And he loves ice cream. So if I can make I’ve heard on tick tock, you can just like literally pour canned peaches into the ice cream machine and it will make ice cream from just just a can of peaches.

I know he would absolutely freakin die. Okay, it would be like the thing we eat all summer. My one year old who does not eat anything except for fruit. I could get her to maybe eat some protein or some fats with her fruit and make some ice cream like fruity ice cream with it and give that to her as food. Oh my gosh, I was just like, you know, I need to get an adaptive stock. It is out of stock. I went to go buy it today. And it’s out of stock. And I’m seriously rip. It’s I’m so sad. So I might go to Sam’s Club. I will have a Sam’s Club membership. I hate Sam’s Club. I don’t know why there’s no reason I just don’t like it. And I might see if my mother in law can get me in to the Sam’s Club one because now I was like, you know, like you’re set on buying something and you’re like, been toying with it. And I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna go all in. It’s kind of like an impulse purchase. Kind of like, you know, it’s a big one and I but I’ve been thinking about it, I’m ready to do it. And then you got to do it. It’s not there. Like that is so much more disappointing than just saying no to it in the first place.
So frustrated, so frustrated, whatever. Okay, that was our snacks and tracks. I’m gonna stop talking about the frickin ice cream back into what our daily life update is going on with one if you are on my close friends list or you’re a subscriber to my Instagram, you know this already, but we are having some troubles with our nanny I kind of talked about a little bit in the last week’s episode too. But today’s her last day, and then from here on out. We have no more nanny coverage until May 20, I believe. So today is April 25. April 26, April 26. So for almost a month, I am going to be without a nanny. So we’re gonna get really, really creative in how we record these podcasts and how I work.

So stay tuned for further updates on if CarliAnna is going to get any work done and if so, how she’s gonna get absolutely any freaking work done. Literally guys, I would rather hire any other type of employee in my business, any other employee, rather than have to hire a new nanny. I don’t know what it is about it, but it is the most stressful hire continually I have ever had to make an ever will make. It just is so hard to find someone that you feel like can take care of your kids. I pay for Goodwill, I pay for Goodwill.

Okay. So it’s not that. But it’s just like, I feel like the age group of nannies at least that I’ve always find they’re like 20 to 24 they’re always in college. It’s never like, you know, it’s not like a job that they want to do for forever. Like, if you want someone who’s like, I’m going to do the job forever. You do have to pay like 90 to 80,000 a year which I
can’t afford that quite yet. And so we pay like 25 to $30 an hour and which for I feel like for a college job was for him good. Okay, but we just always have a hard time like finding someone who like takes the job still seriously. And again, like I feel like I’m a I’m a pretty flexible boss like all of her employees. They have unlimited PTO. To like, the nice thing about this job is, if you have to last minute go and do something like I’m flexible enough to be like, that’s totally fine. I can hang out with the kids, like, I enjoy hanging out with my kids. And my work is flexible enough to like, Hold on for a second. I can do that no problem. The problem I do have is when every single freaking week, there is continually
those things coming up like, hey, last minute, I’m going to be out of state. Or last minute, I’m going to be on vacation out of the country last minute, I need to rest last minute I need to it’s like, again, I get it. Like I want to be the boss that like is able to be flexible like that. But what is every single week?

So we had so yeah, today is my name is last day. Because yeah, it’s hard. But we have a new nanny and her new place in Idaho. And I’m really excited, I feel really good about her. And hopefully it will be better from here on out.
Also just a little update. I’m planning a lot of collaborations in May and June and I’m excited for it. So stay tuned, we’re going to be collabing with a brief collective, we’re going to be collabing with my copywriter Whyville studio, we’re going to be copying I’m just I’m really excited for all the collaborations we have coming up collaborations are one of my favorite things to do because it just feels more like friends hanging out. But you get to do cool fun things and like everyone gets excited, just the energy in collaborations is unmatched. So I’m very very excited

Okay, now I’m going to get into a little how to podcast everyone’s Well, it’s fun to do a little how to podcast, especially something that when I gave the presentation this morning for boundaries, it was so fun. And I was just like, I want to talk about this more. So instead of doing what I was originally gonna do for the podcast this morning, we’re going to be giving you just like a little snippet. tiny snippet of what is going inside the skill program inside 10k GG. If you guys like want the full this is again, just one workshop we’ve done before just this month, and we’re gonna keep doing work workshops until the end of July. And then after that, we’re going back to doing a workshop a month plus other calls, come and join 10 KGD, who go to 10k Girl gang.com The link is in the bio, all you have to do is go and apply. It is so much freaking fun. I love every single person inside 10k GG it is just an absolute blast to hang out with all of these freaking women. So let’s get into boundaries and why they are so important, why we’re talking about them. All of that fun, fun, fun, good stuff. So they’re really in my mind, like two reasons why I feel like boundaries are so freakin important inside of our businesses. One is with boundaries like that is the key to you being mentally sane, like I want you as a business owner to be mentally sane. When I was doing all of the research before I create a workshop like this because every time I do a workshop like this, I always do I go back to my books that refer to something like boundaries. And I google articles I read Harvard Business articles, I read Forbes articles. Basically, I just want to get a collection of ideas so that I can like just make sure one I’m updated.

Well, and to just to see like, is this gonna spark any other ideas in there? Can I connect things whatever, I just like to get ideas anyways. It was honestly one of the saddest research projects I have ever done, ever. Because normally when I research like, Okay, let’s go and research. Like, for example, last week, or last month, we were talking about accounting and so I was doing a ton of research on like, payroll, how to pay yourself how to make sure you stay on top of your business, finances are so much really good, helpful information on that, and really inspirational stuff that I was finding on the internet. And I thought that as a society, we had kind of moved more into a place as far as business culture wise, where we realize and understand how important breaks are inside of our business. Oh boy, I was so dead freaking wrong. Okay, Harvard did a study on like 200 of the most successful CEOs in the I don’t know if the entire world or it was just the US, but follow them for an extended amount of time and tracked all of their hours because they know that ce o ‘s have the hardest time allocating their time and being efficient with their time. And the numbers were absolutely disgusting. Literally, like almost all the CEOs on average worked 62 hours a week, 49% of them worked weekends, like 2% of them had taken a vacation in the past year. And if they did take a vacation, it was two weeks or less. And 17 was home. Oh my gosh, I can’t even remember the percentage, but it was like an absurd amount, percentage wise, worked even while they were on vacation. And then I was doing more research. And the things that they had to say like about those numbers. They weren’t even like appalled. At those own numbers. They were just like, oh, yeah, like that’s kind of like what it costs to be a CEO like you have to put in those hours. That’s just like what it is. And it just made me so sad to see that like as a society, we have just so normally accepted that. And that’s just like how it is. And nobody wants to change that or is questioning like is that a healthy thing? Like I’m questioning is 40 hours, even a healthy type of work around? And we’re having people saying, oh, yeah, I’m working 62 hours a week or more? And that’s just like what it is? Absolutely not. No, no, no, no, no, we are reconstructing this idea of what it looks like to be a healthy CEO. One other thing before we move on, is I saw this other little, I don’t know just article about like what CEOs have to say about taking vacations and why they hate vacations. Elon Musk has taken two vacations in his entire career and is now adamantly against them. One, he was on his honey freakin moon, his honeymoon, they get to the place of his honeymoon, plane lands. And as soon as the plane lands, they find out that his board of whatever they had replaced him as the CEO basically fired him replaced him with someone else. And so he had to as soon as he landed, get back home, fly back and fight for his job. Second vacation he had ever been on. He contracted like malaria or something and almost died. And so he was like, okay, yeah, basically, see, your vacations are evil, and I’m just never gonna go on a vacation. Like, are you telling me that if your business is so fragile enough, that if you leave for one freaking week, someone is going to replace you and your business is actually going to burn to the ground like actually, like he got his job completely replaced, lost his job because he was gone for not even a whole week.

This was even before the vacation even started, like, tell me how bad of a CEO can you be if you can’t even leave your business to run like, oh my gosh, which I guess leads me to my second point. And I want you guys to be freaking successful. And in order for you guys to be successful, your business needs a break from you. It needs a break in order for you to survive. Your business is like a little baby. We hear that all the time. It’s my baby. It’s my baby. Okay, well guess what? Your baby, it’s gotta grow up someday. And are we always going to be this little helicopter mama, who is just like holding on to me and like, I was my baby’s first love and our baby like our kid is trying to get married to someone else. And we’re showing up to the wedding, like wearing a white gown. And we’re like, no, but like, I’m the real star here. No, like, we want our business to grow up and become independent. And then all of a sudden, our kid is gonna start having grandchildren and we get to reap those wins, right? Yes, grandchildren. This is amazing. And I don’t do any work. Like, I want that for us and for our business. I want us to be able to freakin reap the benefits. While our business still being independent. Our business has got to leave the nest its Grata group got to grow up someday. And by us hindering its growth by standing in the way and saying no, you have to be I’m your mama, like I have to be everything for you like we are hindering its growth Bay, we have to get out of the way. And we have to take breaks. And in order to take breaks from our business. We have to have boundaries set up. Boundaries are the freaking keepers of our mental health. It is the keepers of our job. Boundaries are like the little safe space that you create around yourself and around your business. And when shit is happening and like coming in at your business, you’ve got that little bubble safezone created for you because you’re like it’s okay, I’ve got this boundary setup. So even though that sucks and that is out of my control. I have all of this stuff that I have already put into control. And I’ve already got going for me that are going to help save me in this crazy situation. Do you guys see what I’m saying here like boundaries are so freakin important to our mental health and to the success of our business no more I’m against taking vacations, Kay, vacations, taking breaks are in the long run, going to help you become more successful. Period.

Okay. Oh my gosh, now. I get really I got really passionate about that. Can you tell why guys, I wanted to keep talking about this because I just felt really passionate talking about it. And our time kgg call today. Okay, now we’re gonna get a little bit into I’m not gonna get into like setting boundaries and all that stuff today. And like how we set boundaries. And then because that’s where the take kgg call, but we are going to get into a little bit of like, the mindset tips for setting boundaries. And why is it sometimes so hard for us? And why is mindset so important when it comes to this? Okay. Okay. Now before we kind of even get into that, and this is going to feel so disconnected, but I promise this is going to lead into something later. Okay? Is I want you guys to think about why are we here? Why are we even here? Why are you running your freakin business? Why are you listening to this frickin business podcast? Okay, what is the ultimate goal here? Is our ultimate goal really, truly to work a million hours, or to become the most liked Instagram Instagram posts, or even to have the most perfect portfolio? Or to be perfect. Our very first launch like is that your ultimate goal? And if it is leave cages, hang up the podcast and go away because you’re here for the wrong reasons. Okay? No, I want people who are here, because they want opportunities, because they want options because they want freedom. And they want to create a life better than what they had 10 years ago, or five years ago, or just last week, okay, we’re here to better ourselves, and to become a better person. And we have a very, very descriptive idea of what that is in our head for me, like, I want to be sitting on the back porch, I want to be doing cross stitch on be listening to a magical fantasy book. And I want my kids to be playing with some cows or in a river or something that is totally wrong. I don’t want no neighbors around me, I want nothing around me. And that’s all I want. And then maybe my cousins come in later, and we play like some board games and watch a movie like that. That to me is idyllic. That is what I want. And that is what I’m striving for in my day to day life. Okay, I want money and I want freedom. Okay, so now that we have, what are we here for, we’re gonna go into the next step, which is the mindset that we need to have, again, this is gonna seem disconnected, but I promise you, we’re gonna come back to that later. You are an owner.

Okay, that is your job. You are not a freelancer, you are not an employee, you are not a creative director. Yes, those all fall under your little belt of things that you do. But ultimately, at the end of the day, you are first and foremost, an owner of a company. And we need to be treating your job. As such, you are a shareholder over an asset that you own. We need to have that mindset going forward. Like what are the decisions that as we’re looking at this business, as an owner, and a shareholder, what decisions need to be made and what things need to happen in order for it to be successful. And as again, a CEO and an owner, there’s a few things that fall into that category are things that you do you need to know your numbers, you need to be able to create a culture that is equal to your values, and you need to deliver on the promises that you’ll give to your clients. So that’s like things that an owner should be doing.

And I always add in like fourth, like, do whatever else makes you happy, like defining that CEO role for you can look however you want. Like, those are the three things that really I feel like every owner should do, knowing your numbers, creating a company, a company culture that is equal to your values, and then delivering on the promises that you have to your clients. But lastly, like what is the thing that makes her job fun? Like for me, it’s teaching and doing this podcast. For you. It might be creative directing for you. It also might be doing the coding and a website. Like there could be something else that’s like part of your zone of genius that I want you to include in your little ownership box. Okay? And boundaries. What we’re doing today is creating a little box around your job, okay? That is your job boundaries are creating the box around it. And guess what happens when we create that box successfully? And we do just what is in our, our role, and we treat our business like a asset that we own. And we treat it like a community we deliver its promises. We do all this stuff that we’ve promised to do we
deliver on the promises that we’ve made promises to my customers, and promises to my employees and promises to my future employees. Making sure that my company delivers on its promises is my number one job. And doing those four things, knowing my numbers, creating company cultures, delivering on the promises, whatever, that is how I do that. That is how I do that. Like, for example, me, I have a promise to myself and to my family that I’m going to make payroll. And I also have a promise to my employees, I’m gonna make payroll, they depend on me, for me to make payroll and for me to pay them what they need to live, and to survive. So therefore, I have a boundary around how much I can charge for certain things. Because I have to make payroll, that is my boundary, I also have a promise that like, I want to make sure every single person who comes into the tank aggregate or bmm has fun and makes a free ton of money. And so I go into all of my programs, and I’m like, okay, is this delivering on those two things? Are people having fun in this program? And are people making a free ton of money in this program? Are we giving them all the tools that they need to have those things? And we’re constantly evolving those processes, we’re constantly trying to make it better. So that so that we can deliver on our promises? Like, is this making sense, guys, like, we’re here? Because we want freedom, we want opportunities, and as an owner, you own that, okay?
And you need to deliver on those promises. If you’re like, Oh, my God, Carly, but like, I , and if you feel like okay, yeah, I can do this, like, I’m gonna, you know, deliver on my promises, and I’m gonna do this. And we can sometimes fall into the camp of workaholic, which is where our boundaries can sometimes be a little shaky to, like, I feel like you can always take this device to like one or two spectrums, like workaholic, or like, yeah, like, I’m going to like deliver on my customers promises, but maybe not my own promises. Or you can go the other side of the spectrum, which is like, I’m going to make sure that the boundaries are on myself and my my personal health are strong, but like, I’m not going to super deliver on the promises to my customers. And I’m not going to like push myself creatively a little bit.

And so for those of you who feel like you struggle more with a workaholic, and I’m keeping your boundaries, I have this quote, and I think it’s from Brene Brown, I quoted Brene Brown a lot in this presentation, because I frickin love her. If you have not read her leadership book, and you struggle with boundaries, just go read it. But she said, if we never feel as though we’re enough, we can throw ourselves into our work and try to ascertain enoughness from our output, usefulness and indispensability. Basically saying, We’re never going to find our purpose inside of our work, we’re never going to be completely fulfilled inside of our work. Your worth is beyond your work. Is not like saying, oh my gosh, you can’t have boundaries. You can’t have a life. You have all this stuff. Because if you don’t, if you don’t work 24/7 All of a sudden, who are you anymore? Who are you? You’re not like CarliAnna? You’re somebody else? No, your enoughness comes from you. It comes from only you, you’re the only one who could take care of you. You’re the only one who decide that, okay, you have power over that. And if you struggle with that, go find a freakin hobby, okay, I’m telling you, finding a hobby is going to be one of the best things that you ever do, especially as a workaholic, working out. And training for a marathon reading books has honestly been one of the best things. For me, personal mindset wise, but also success wise, I feel like the ability for me to, again, take a step back. And to be able to get a different perspective has been mind blowing for my success. I really truly feel like some of the most successful people get lots of different people’s perspectives. And I say no, it’s like, why when you like, look at different companies. And you’re like, what you’re so far out of reality, like you’re so just not in touch with people want. And it’s because I think they don’t have hobbies. Like, it’s that simple. Like, you can’t be working 80 hours a week, and then know what your customers want and be able to relate to them. No, like, I don’t I don’t think that’s how it works. You got to be somewhat relatable. Okay, and then if you feel like you struggle with the anti household things where you’re just like, I’m going to draw this big, thick wall, and I’m never going to let anyone in.

This is my boundary. I’m not going to break it no matter what people say. And you’re worried you’re going to be a big fat meanie. This, this is this is what we need to do. Okay, here’s another Brene Brown quote for you. This is the one that’s gonna be helpful for you. When this thing came from. Here’s a quote when this thing came up for my therapist. What if people are doing the best they can? I thought my husband had the most beautiful answer to that question. He said I will never know whether people are doing. The best they can or not, but when I assume people are, it makes my life better. And then she goes on to say, boundaries are freaking important. They’re not fake walls are not separation boundaries are not division. They are respect. And they are who they are. Here’s what’s okay for me. And here’s what’s not okay for me, not as simple as that. And I included that first part of like, assuming just that people are there to make your life better, because I think a lot of us who have really, really strict boundaries, and don’t want to break that wall down for anything or anyone, because there’s always going to be an exception to the rule, right, and an exception to the boundary for always. But I think that those people who are like, No, I’m putting boundaries up on everything, and no one can ever touch me, I think it’s a long time because we’ve been burned by people in the past or you’ve been burned by other businesses, or we’re just scared of being mean. And honestly, putting up boundaries is not what makes you a horrible mean person, we just have to assume that everybody is out there trying their best and doing their best. And when we assume okay, you know what, I can’t control what they’re doing, but I’m assuming that they’re doing the best. And what we do is we come from a place of understanding, and an empathetic side where we say like, hi, I want to understand this perspective that you have, and I don’t want you to get hurt. And so therefore, I have to put up this boundary, I can’t be working past six o’clock, I have to have this kind of communication or in working with you. It’s not I being me, and and I hate you type of thing. It’s, I love you so much, that and I respect you so much, that I need this to happen in order for us to have an amazing relationship.

And here’s just another quote from father, Richard Rohr, he said, If you do not transform your pain, you will transmit it. So if you are being hurt by a client being hurt by social media being hurt by a family member, whatever it is, if you do not transmit that pain, communicate it and hold to that boundary. Wait, no, if you do not transform that pain into something healthy and communicate it, you will put it out. So if you’re worried about boundaries being mean, baby, that is the nicest thing you can do. If you don’t put up boundaries, that’s when we start becoming hostile, that’s when we start becoming mean, the nicest thing you could ever do for your business, for your relationships for your clients, is to put boundaries, you’re gonna make yourself 10 times more available, you’re gonna put out 10 times better content, you’re going to become 10 times the business owner, when you put up those boundaries to protect yourself because you are the most important asset in your company. Your Business always needs a break from you, it does not revolve around you, that you are the one who comes up with ideas, you are the one who cultivates the culture. And so we have to protect you at all costs. And in order to protect yourself, you have to be the one to do that. Nobody not even your partner can be the one to come in and be like you need to Carly, you need to take a break. You have to do it yourself. So if you guys are not taking breaks, I hope this little episode helps you to create some boundaries around yourself. And if you get if you want to hear more from this presentation, this is just the mindset part of it. After this presentation, we got into like, how to take time away. I don’t know tell me how you guys like these podcasts.

This is a little bit more how to and not quite as like casual. But these are really fun for me. And so let me know if you want to hear more podcasts like this. Oh, and I got sidetracked. And if you want to hear more of this presentation, we talked more about how to create boundaries, how to take time off and went past a little bit more than mindset stuff. But it was helpful for you guys, I hope you have a fun time I did.

I feel like I got really passionate there at the beginning and at the end because I just think this is such an important thing for all of us business owners to really understand his boundaries and I just got so fired up when I saw how horrible boundaries still are with business owners and CEOs and how just expected it is to never ever take a break in your business. And if babes if you ever want to take a break in your business, you have to have boundaries you have to have boundaries, because the only way your business is going to grow and transform so I’m gonna leave it at that and I will see you guys next week. Love you all  and hope you have a safe day

May 30, 2023

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